Disastrous yet unfinished

last week had been quite miserable.my sketches got rejected twice.sigh~i tried as hard as i could,maybe i've not given my best yet.i just have to deal with this kind of thing,don't i?i mean if i cant take it,what am i gonna do when i graduate?
i truly realised after i've gone through this - learning is a hard process!
Designing,sewing-machine,handsewing,drafting,measurements etc etc there's just a lot!
Even gettin an approval of the lecturer took days!
finally,got down to finish my pattern drafting,cuz i told myself i never want to waste time anymore NO more last minute work.its depressing!and if i'm desperate to finish it,i just simply do,no effort at all!tat's bad!
Yea it's SO much fun learning,but the pressure is always there.i felt myself living up to people expectations.isn't fashion a free thing?its not controlled isnt it?huh~!i'm really learning to accept ppl's opinions,criticism n plus rejection.the way the lecturers looked at ur designs n got really serious face,kept quiet makes me ponder what's running in their minds.
Well,i guess they're just trying to make me better.thank goodness at least now i have better professional lecturers.they r the ones who kind of make me here now.improving.however improving is a lot of work.i need to put my whole heart in!
i never want to give up,i never did!why?cuz God is always with me!He never leaves!my source of strength n patience even came from God.I jus cant imagine my life without God.its true tat i have so much pressure,stress,miserable days,rejection, etc but God is the one who encouraged me,as so i'm not going to fall.fall but not crushed!I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.i could never stand alone without Him,Lord Jesus Christ!
Thank God so much for He stood by me no matter what...amen.

works
- do as many designs as possible [guitar concept]
- pattern drafting according to fren's measurements
- hand-stitching (put in file & label)
- tsf camp booklet draft
- learn with adobe illustrator

never give up no matter what!!thank God!amen!

A poem

I really like this poem though..so decided to re-post it.first time posting wasn't really clear

Dedicated to a multi-instrumentalist, also an artiste known as melody maker...

I might not understand all
But it caused me to explore
All that is in the songs
I can feel deep into it

Feeling all the way through
It gave me full emotions
It gave me full expressions
It gave me complete peace

Every song bring its own
Every word meaningful
Every music beautiful
Took my breath away

Flowing through my mind
Came in right to the heart
Pierced through my soul
Lifted up my spirit

Listened, the words captivating
Listened, the music playing
It's so wonderful
It's simply amazing

the aritste that I mentioned is none other than Alexander LeehomWang...its not just his looks but his music & words.which is why i wrote this poem about him and his wonderful awesome journey of his music.

You never know
That beneath the darkest place
I cried a rush of crystal clear waters
The thought of us destroyed
Brings expectations and possibilities
Thinking you've already got someone
Or maybe even more than just that

You came like a whole lots of bright stars
I caught a few but more are left
However,a few is enough for my hopeful heart
As your face and words laid on me
Your words make a huge impact to me
I looked up to you in admiration
Listening attentively,sneaked at your face
So full of charms and shocks

Your laughter mesmerized me
In such a way that I smiled broadly
I took a glance and gaze at you
The way you looked back
Just melts my whole body
And even as you whispers to my ear
I felt a sense of unexplainable passion

All feelings and thoughts about you
Kept me amused yet bitter
For I was never sure about you
It's growing every wonderful weekend
Are you the one,I do not know
Maybe you've already found the one
You see,I was never sure about you

I sure hope I understands you
There is so much in common between us
But you never want to share
Sometimes,my heart just aches
All because of you
I tried avoiding any pain from you
I tried to grow with you
But you were always an infant
When it comes to me

I don't know whats running in your mind
It's just so mysterious
I want to embark on this journey
To discover the real you and its mysteries
I might find lots of things
If I found that particular thing
I know its when I let go
Everything I've ever known about you

You know what,it hurts
When u hold on to that someone
Someone I know you treasured a lot more
I'm just like a tiny dot in you
If you found that particular thing in me
That both of us shared
I will hold on with all I am

sarah - something about you and me

The wheel turned back to me
Once again you lit up my heart
Red began filling and fuller on wheel
Your light just seems to be there

But why,why did you have to destroy it?
Broke my heart in pieces like shattered parts
You took my red with you as well
When can I get it back?

It always go back and forth
For you turned my wheel of red
Swaying here and there
Can't you just stop the wheel?

Stop so you would not keep destroying it
It's like YOUR jigsaw puzzle
Put it into pieces and break it
Break it and put it into pieces

Many dots of red filled me now
Instead of one whole piece of red
Hurt and bleeding from it's edge
Can't you understand?

Please stop the wheel
Stop or keep it running
Please do not play jigsaw anymore